Pilgrim's Progress

Facebook & Postmodern Loneliness #2

In a world where more and more of our lives are conducted online, in a sprawling  network of virtual communities, how are we to find true connectedness? The kind that often hurts but the only kind which really satisfies the deep inner places? The kind that gets behind the masks and down to the places in us that long for real connectedness? In the image above I've tried to capture the light and dark side of this - the need and the fear, the anticipation and the hesitation.

But this isn't really about Facebook, or postmodernity, is it? It's really the same old thing - the messy business of daring to show our true colours to others. Because to do so is to hand them the power to treat kindly or cruelly what they see.

And contemporary virtual connectedness, I fear, is too often about keeping people at a distance, rather than about making real connections. About showing others a carefully constructed presentation of ourselves which is designed to be liked, affirmed, and included.

I've posted about this many times, probably because it's the hardest thing I've ever had to do, is to let others cross the line, past the mask. Maybe you find this too.

I'm not envious of those who have 1000+ "friends" on Facebook. Honestly.

What I'm looking for, what we're all looking for in our own way, is "US" ... we are tired of "I".

Downtempo #2

Another meditative prayer ... a desire to live slowly enough to listen. 

Sleep State (96Kbps MP3; 6:00 ; 4MB)

Notes

1. I didn't really "create" this - I merely recorded it. It uses "generative music" techniques - that's to say the notes are randomly generated within a pattern, which here is broadly a pentatonic scale (think wind chimes).
2. Thanks to Angstrom who did all the hard work in Ableton Live 6.

Downtempo #1

Is it possible to live purposefully, passionately, actively, but also slowly? One of my goals is to learn to live at the right speed, but without losing any purpose and passion.

"Downtempo" is a kind of music designed for relaxation and chilling out. Is downtempo living possible in today's world? This tune is my prayer that we might find the right speed ...

Slow Me (96Kbps MP3; 4:42 ; 3MB) Higher quality version available on request for non-commercial use in Christian worship, mission etc.

It's my prayer for me, for you, for the church which is often so busy and frantic.

Even if all around you is a blur
May you find your speed
May you slow down enough to hear his whisper.

Generosity and Ownership

Non-Commercial	Copy, Distribute, Transit

I hoped I wouldn't have to post this, but I guess we have to live in the real world! Despite the Creative Commons license (which no-one reads I reckon), some of my artwork has turned up in a couple of commercial products recently.

When I offer my creative stuff, I'm trying to balance two things:

1. The desire to be generous with it, especially to help God's people in our worship and mission. This is the highest use of any creativity, and it's a privilege to create things that others want to use in this way.
2. The creator's legitimate rights of ownership, and to enjoy the fruits of their labour, and to have the final word on how it is used.

If I get the balance wrong, I hope I err on the side of generosity!

So here's what I've decided to do.

1. When I post an image or animation, it will contain an obvious copyright notice. HOWEVER, if you would like a larger version without the large copyright notice to use non-commercially for worship, or church, or mission, or just for your desktop or whatever, please contact me.
2. When I post music, I'll post a lower quality MP3 (this also saves server space). Again, if you would like to use it non-commercially for worship, or church, or mission, please contact me.

Final word - thanks to all of you who have taken the trouble to contact me about using images and so on - if you're trying to connect people with God, I will almost certainly say yes.

NOTES

1. I will probably come up with some wording for a "blanket" non-commercial license for Dream and other worship communities so that permission is granted without having to consult about each individual item.
2. The terms of the Creative Commons License can be viewed here
3. If you are using something in a worship service, you don't need to give credit.

Surprised by Joy

I don't know where it came from.

Given what's happening around the place, as I watch friends going through difficult things, and as I wrestle with my own ongoing questions, I'm surprised it came.

But it came today as I was working on a piece of music for Dream. The soaring chords of Pachelbel's Canon suddenly lifted me into God's presence, and as I added layers to the music, this mysterious joy seemed to increase.

Pachelbel's Canon (Surprised by Joy Mix) (96K MP3; 4 mins; 3.5MB) Higher quality version available on request for non-commercial use in Christian worship, mission etc.

I believe that what rose up was a desire to be fully alive, and discover what my life's purpose is. Somehow I think making music and visuals is part of the answer to that, and in those moments, I felt fully alive.

I think this piece of music is the sound of my soul getting free.

It's the sound of everything I truly desire in life.

May you discover what makes you come alive
May you discover what sets your soul free
And may you find ways to offer that to the world

Because what the world needs, what the church needs is people who are fully alive ...

Feeling Small Again

An email conversation with a friend this week reminded me again how small we are against the backdrop of an awesome God. In charismatic circles you sometimes get the sense that God should seem close all the time, and that failing to feel close to God is a sign that something's wrong. I think my friend is wrestling with this tension - I wrestle with it daily too.

On paper, we know that it's normal not to feel God close all the time, but I still think we miss it, because in our spirit, we know we were made for intimacy with him.

This journey of knowing God is a journey to the end of time and beyond, but I always long to experience a more intimate walk with him too.

I think this was all in my mind as I came up with this glitchy ambient drum & bass tune using a few famous vocal samples:

Journey to the End of Time (96K MP3; 12 mins; 9.5MB) Higher quality version available on request for non-commercial use in Christian worship, mission etc.

Lord, this tune is my prayer for everyone who is feeling a bit lost in your vastness and would like to sense your closeness again.

Two Things I Ask

"Two things I ask of you, O Lord ...

• Keep falsehood and lying words far from me
• Give me neither poverty nor riches, but feed me only with what I need, lest I be fully satisfied, and refuse to acknowledge you, saying "Who is the Lord?", or lest I be poor and steal, and profane the name of my God."

(Prov 30:8-9; a mixture of translations)

I love this ... what great things to ask God for. What might we call them? Perhaps INTEGRITY and CONTENTMENT? or TRUTHFULNESS and GRATITUDE? But I think my favourite is:

Two things I ask of you, Lord:
STRAIGHTFORWARDNESS & SIMPLICITY

I'm conscious once again of the glaring inequalities in our world, that far too many people don't get a chance to live the life they were created for, while it is far to easy to slip into the dullness of a satisfied lifestyle and out of intimacy with God. I am as guilty as anyone in this!